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Jun 18 2012

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XIII. Something Else

I have had gay sex with my friend, and now I can’t stop thinking about it and there is awkwardness between us and I don’t want to be gay

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4 comments

  1. mondaysarered

    August 1, 2012 at 11:50 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment

    Being gay is not a choice. Only you know if you are gay or not — and you might not even know it now. That’s okay, you’ll figure out what your sexual orientation is with time. If you are gay then I promise you there are a ton of people out there who are exactly the same and who are living very happy lives. It really isn’t the end of the world if you’re gay and you will be much happier if you embrace it rather than fighting it.

    Good luck with everything.

  2. Odysseus

    June 23, 2012 at 6:57 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment

    You wouldn’t be the first person to have had a “bi-curious” encounter and then walk away from it. I did and I still think about it from time to time. I’m now happily married with a couple of kids.

    I hope the friend in question was more of an acquaintance because this is something that cannot be undone and the only way to really put it behind you is to end the friendship.

    As for having liked it, there are some people who get off on taboo and there’s very little that is more taboo than homosexuality. To test the theory, find someone of the opposite sex and have sex with them in a public place. You’ll probably find you get off on that as well.

    If you don’t want to be gay, then don’t be gay. Contrary to what you may have been told, being gay is a choice. You obviously considered yourself a heterosexual before this event so you can go back to that. If you had had sex with someone of a different race and liked it, would you now stop dating people of your race? Like Gramps said: One night does not determine your sexual orientation. You need to look upon this as an experience, perhaps a pleasurable one, but not one that is going to determine the course of the rest of your life.

  3. unluckyatlove

    June 18, 2012 at 7:29 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment

    You had gay sex. You liked it. You ARE gay. I understand you may have misgivings; our society is cruel to homosexuals. But you should be able to find someplace to live where you are more accepted for who you are. To do otherwise, to not be true to yourself, will bring a lifetime of misery.

  4. Gramps

    June 18, 2012 at 5:35 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment

    I don’t know how old you are, but one night does not make a relationship or determine sexual orientation. But the fact that you can’t stop thinking about it does seem to steer you in that direction…

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